Past and future in a battle of choices…

Three weeks after the second day of the new year


Well, Author did warn you she would likely be back this week. And she is. Something that recently happened made her want to write this post, talk to you about choices.

Exchanging one life for another is complicated. Your old life keeps trying to pull you back, and odds are it has many ways of doing so. And no matter how much you want what you see for yourself on the horizon, the way there is inevitably ridden with fears that at times make what you left behind seem more attractive than it was when you lived it, and that’s where the risk lies, the risk of turning back.

To make it even more complicated, a choice to embark on a life-changing venture isn’t made once. It’s made again and again even as you work to achieve your goals, until a critical mass is attained and you don’t have to look back anymore. Choices are made again and again as events happen that remind you of what you left behind, and as you hit bumps in the road going forward, a road that is so very uncertain to begin with. Your old workplace might call to ask if you would do a job for them (yes, that’s what happened to Author the other day), and if you happened to have left behind a stable income, saying no might make you feel irresponsible toward your family and even more worried about the choice you’ve made. Something you’ve done or created might not have gotten the reaction you wanted, and that might make you doubt yourself, wonder if perhaps you’re no good, perhaps you have no chance of achieving your dream. Perhaps it is safer back there, in that familiar past you just left. You were so good at it, so why leave your comfort zone?

When that happens, take a moment. No matter how hard that is, how emotionally impossible it may be to think clearly when you feel disappointed or disappointing, failed or failing, just try to stop and consider. Look at what you’ve left behind, and at what you’re progressing toward. Compare the two. Where does the future you want lie? And this is experience talking. Author and Sister have done that, they’ve looked back and realized their past was a dead end. And then they looked forward, and knew everything they wanted lay ahead. (Oh, and that offer from a past client? Author said no. She and Sister are with you to stay.)

Remember that choices are like a corridor of endless doors stretching before you. Even after you’ve made a choice, chose the door you believe was meant for you, once you go through it and continue on your way you will again, at some point, find yourself in a corridor lined with more doors, symbolizing your choices of the past and those created as you progress. Again and again you will find yourself having to choose that road you’ve already chosen, and again and again you will be required to make the same choice in the face of the alternative of your past. And every time you make the same choice, the steps you take forward will be more determined and the past’s hold on you will weaken.

Choices can wreak havoc with your resolve. That’s okay. It’s what that overlapping of what you left in your past and the decision to embark on the road to a new future does. It’s what choices do. Just remember, having choices is a good thing. And having new choices pop up doesn’t make the choice you’ve already made wrong.

A tip from Author and Sister: Believe in yourself.


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